Chapter XXX

Caesar, on returning to Rome, was angry because he had returned, and
after some days was filled anew with a wish to visit Achaea. He even
issued an edict in which he declared that his absence would be short,
and that public affairs would not be exposed to detriment because of it.
In company with Augustians, among whom was Vinicius, he repaired to the
Capitol to make offerings to the gods for an auspicious journey. But on
the second day, when he visited the temple of Vesta, an event took place
which changed all his projects. Nero feared the gods, though he did not
believe in them; he feared especially the mysterious Vesta, who filled
him with such awe that at sight of the divinity and the sacred fire his
hair rose on a sudden from terror, his teeth chattered, a shiver ran
through his limbs, and he dropped into the arms of Vinicius, who
happened there behind him. He was borne out of the temple at once, and
conveyed to the Palatine, where he recovered soon, but did not leave the
bed for that day. He declared, moreover, to the great astonishment of
those present, that he deferred his journey, since the divinity had
warned him secretly against haste. An hour later it was announced
throughout Rome that Cæsar, seeing the gloomy faces of the citizens, and
moved by love for them, as a father for his children, would remain to
share their lot and their pleasures. The people, rejoiced at this
decision, and certain also that they would not miss games and a
distribution of wheat, assembled in crowds before the gates of the
Palatine, and raised shouts in honor of the divine Cæsar, who
interrupted the play at dice with which he was amusing himself with
Augustians, and said:

"Yes, there was need to defer the journey. Egypt, and predicted
dominion over the Orient, cannot escape me; hence Achæa, too, will not
be lost. I will give command to cut through the isthmus of Corinth; I
will rear such monuments in Egypt that the pyramids will seem childish
toys in comparison; I will have a sphinx built seven times greater than
that which is gazing into the desert outside Memphis; but I will command
that it have my face. Coming ages will speak only of that monument and
of me."

"With thy verses thou hast reared a monument to thyself already, not
seven, but thrice seven, times greater than the pyramid of Cheops," said
Petronius.

"But with my song?" inquired Nero.

"Ah! if men could only build for thee a statue, like that of Memnon, to
call with thy voice at sunrise! For all ages to come the seas adjoining
Egypt would swarm with ships in which crowds from the three parts of the
world would be lost in listenmg to thy song."

"Alas! who can do that?" said Nero.

"But thou canst give command to cut out of basalt thyself driving a
quadriga."

"True! I will do that!"

"Thou wilt bestow a gift on humanity."

"In Egypt I will marry the Moon, who is now a widow, and I shall be a
god really."

"And thou wilt give us stars for wives; we will make a new
constellation, which will be called the constellation of Nero. But do
thou marry Vitelius to the Nile, so that he may beget hippopotamuses.
Give the desert to Tigellinus, he will be king of the jackals."

"And what dost thou predestine to me?" inquired Vatinius.

"Apis bless thee! Thou didst arrange such splendid games in Beneventum
that I cannot wish thee ill. Make a pair of boots for the sphinx, whose
paws must grow numb during night-dews; after that thou will make sandals
for the Colossi which form the alleys before the temples. Each one will
find there a fitting occupation. Domitius Afer, for example, will be
treasurer, since he is known for his honesty. I am glad, Cæsar, when
thou art dreaming of Egypt, and I am saddened because thou hast deferred
thy plan of a journey."

"Thy mortal eyes saw nothing, for the deity becomes invisible to
whomever it wishes," said Nero. "Know that when I was in the temple of
Vesta she herself stood near me, and whispered in my ear, 'Defer the
journey.' That happened so unexpectedly that I was terrified, though for
such an evident care of the gods for me I should be thankful."

"We were all terrified," said Tigellinus, "and the vestal Rubria
fainted."

"Rubria!" said Nero; "what a snowy neck she has!"

"But she blushed at sight of the divine Cæsar--"

"True! I noticed that myself. That is wonderful. There is something
divine in every vestal, and Rubria is very beautiful.

"Tell me," said he, after a moment's meditation, "why people fear Vesta
more than other gods. What does this mean? Though I am the chief
priest, fear seized me to-day. I remember only that I was falling back,
and should have dropped to the ground had not some one supported me.
Who was it?"

"I," answered Vinicius.

"Oh, thou 'stern Mars'! Why wert thou not in Beneventum? They told me
that thou wert ill, and indeed thy face is changed. But I heard that
Croton wished to kill thee? Is that true?"

"It is, and he broke my arm; but I defended myself."

"With a broken arm?"

"A certain barbarian helped me; he was stronger than Croton."

Nero looked at him with astonishment. "Stronger than Croton? Art thou
jesting? Croton was the strongest of men, but now here is Syphax from
Ethiopia."

"I tell thee, Cæsar, what I saw with my own eyes."

"Where is that pearl? Has he not become king of Nemi?"

"I cannot tell, Cæsar. I lost sight of him."

"Thou knowest not even of what people he is?"

"I had a broken arm, and could not inquire for him."

"Seek him, and find him for me."

"I will occupy myself with that," said Tigellinus.

But Nero spoke further to Vinicius: "I thank thee for having supported
me; I might have broken my head by a fall. On a time thou wert a good
companion, but campaigning and service with Corbulo have made thee wild
in some way; I see thee rarely.

"How is that maiden too narrow in the hips, with whom thou wert in
love," asked he after a while, "and whom I took from Aulus for thee?"

Vinicius was confused, but Petronius came to his aid at that moment. "I
will lay a wager, lord," said he, "that he has forgotten. Dost thou see
his confusion? Ask him how many of them there were since that time, and
I will not give assurance of his power to answer. The Vinicii are good
soldiers, but still better gamecocks. They need whole flocks. Punish
him for that, lord, by not inviting him to the feast which Tigellinus
promises to arrange in thy honor on the pond of Agrippa."

"I will not do that. I trust, Tigellinus, that flocks of beauty will
not be lacking there."

"Could the Graces be absent where Amor will be present?" answered
Tigellinus.

"Weariness tortures me," said Nero. "I have remained in Rome at the
will of the goddess, but I cannot endure the city. I will go to Antium.
I am stifled in these narrow streets, amid these tumble-down houses,
amid these alleys. Foul air flies even here to my house and my gardens.
Oh, if an earthquake would destroy Rome, if some angry god would level
it to the earth! I would show how a city should be built, which is the
head of the world and my capital."

"Cæsar," answered Tigellinus, "thou sayest, 'If some angry god would
destroy the city,'--is it so?"

"It is! What then?"

"But art thou not a god?"

Nero waved his hand with an expression of weariness, and said,--"We
shall see thy work on the pond of Agrippa. Afterward I go to Antium.
Ye are all little, hence do not understand that I need immense things."

Then he closed his eyes, giving to understand in that way that he needed
rest. In fact, the Augustians were beginning to depart. Petronius went
out with Vinicius, and said to him,--"Thou art invited, then, to share
in the amusement. Bronzebeard has renounced the journey, but he will be
madder than ever; he has fixed himself in the city as in his own house.
Try thou, too, to find in these madnesses amusement and forgetfulness.
Well! we have conquered the world, and have a right to amuse ourselves.
Thou, Marcus, art a very comely fellow, and to that I ascribe in part
the weakness which I have for thee. By the Ephesian Diana! if thou
couldst see thy joined brows, and thy face in which the ancient blood of
the Quirites is evident! Others near thee looked like freedmen. True!
were it not for that mad religion, Lygia would be in thy house to-day.
Attempt once more to prove to me that they are not enemies of life and
mankind. They have acted well toward thee, hence thou mayst be grateful
to them; but in thy place I should detest that religion, and seek
pleasure where I could find it. Thou art a comely fellow, I repeat, and
Rome is swarming with divorced women."

"I wonder only that all this does not torture thee yet?"

"Who has told thee that it does not? It tortures me this long time, but
I am not of thy years. Besides, I have other attachments which are
lacking thee. I love books, thou hast no love for them; I love poetry,
which annoys thee; I love pottery, gems, a multitude of things, at which
thou dost not look; I have a pain in my loins, which thou hast not; and,
finally, I have found Eunice, but thou hast found nothing similar. For
me, it is pleasant in my house, among masterpieces; of thee I can never
make a man of æsthetic feeling. I know that in life I shall never find
anything beyond what I have found; thou thyself knowest not that thou
art hoping yet continually, and seeking. If death were to visit thee,
with all thy courage and sadness, thou wouldst die with astonishment
that it was necessary to leave the world; but I should accept death as a
necessity, with the conviction that there is no fruit in the world which
I have not tasted. I do not hurry, neither shall I loiter; I shall try
merely to be joyful to the end. There are cheerful sceptics in the
world. For me, the Stoics are fools; but stoicism tempers men, at
least, while thy Christians bring sadness into the world, which in life
is the same as rain in nature. Dost thou know what I have learned?
That during the festivities which Tigellinus will arrange at the pond of
Agrippa, there will be lupanaria, and in them women from the first
houses of Rome. Will there be not even one sufficiently beautiful to
console thee? There will be maidens, too, appearing in society for the
first time--as nymphs. Such is our Roman Cæsardom! The air is mild
already; the midday breeze will warm the water and not bring pimples on
naked bodies. And thou, Narcissus, know this, that there will not be
one to refuse thee,--not one, even though she be a vestal virgin."

Vinicius began to strike his head with his palm, like a man occupied
eternally with one thought.

"I should need luck to find such a one."

"And who did this for thee, if not the Christians? But people whose
standard is a cross cannot be different. Listen to me: Greece was
beautiful, and created wisdom; we created power; and what, to thy
thinking, can this teaching create? If thou know, explain; for, by
Pollux! I cannot divine it."

"Thou art afraid, it seems, lest I become a Christian," said Vinicius,
shrugging his shoulders.

"I am afraid that thou hast spoiled life for thyself. If thou canst not
be a Grecian, be a Roman; possess and enjoy. Our madnesses have a
certain sense, for there is in them a kind of thought of our own. I
despise Bronzebeard, because he is a Greek buffoon. If he held himself
a Roman, I should recognize that he was right in permitting himself
madness. Promise me that if thou find some Christian on returning home,
thou wilt show thy tongue to him. If he be Glaucus the physician, he
will not wonder.--Till we meet on the pond of Agrippa."